Slow down, you move too fast

"You do not need to leave your room.

Remain sitting at your table and listen.

Do not even listen, simply wait.

Be quiet, still and solitary.

The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked,

it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet."

Franz Kafka

With all the changes as of late, I am now trying to savor all that life has to offer - and to relax in the process. For the past year, I have been juggling work and a preemie and it was one difficult road. A "marathon" as our pediatrician says. Unless you've been through it yourself, it is hard to comprehend and even empathize.

And slowing down offers multiple benefits: you start having real connections again - with people, with events, with time. Your focus can change from what you fear, to what you want in your life. From gossip to love. From tearing down to support.

I was mired in "just getting by", angry and exhausted. I felt as if I had no choice in the matter, I was making do as best as I could. I was amazed that people quote-unquote close to you would offer to help you and then when you'd say okay, tell you they were too busy. But then a stranger would snowplow my sidewalk or driveway, or ask how I was doing and really listen. I now realize that I can only see who the close friends are by their actions (not words) over time - who will really support you in tough situations and who won't.

The one thing I've learned over time is that who you truly are doesn't change. And life throws circumstances your way (why, I do not know) and sometimes we are destined to repeat them. But once we work to switch from regret and anger to acceptance then celebration, we are on our way to true freedom. The latter, I am still trying to incorporate.

In the upcoming weeks I will try to focus on what is true and real, be it spending more time with family, nurturing true friendships, acceptance of what is, contemplating what can be, or health and happiness. I'll be taking a lot of time. Not answering phone calls. Or the door. Maybe you won't hear from me. A big unplugging. The true definition of "quality" time. I blinked, and my life shifted from quality to quantity sometime in the last four years. I suppose now is an opportunity to set things straight. To fully dive in to what is going on here, and now. To be still, quiet. To let life unfold and let love meet me where it will.

More information:

- Downshifting and new priorities

- "Slow" parenting

- Slow Love by Dominique Browning. (her blog)

- Ten tips on how to slow down now (especially tip #10)